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There are lots of reasons why someone may sign into OK Cupid, check their messages, and not message you back. Or, they might be checking their inbox quickly, and will respond later. But the quickest way to get yourself classified as a psycho is to message someone more than once without getting a reply. Repeat messaging says, “I am a creep with boundary issues.” And sure, there’s someone out there for everyone, but you will widen your dating pool by not being a creep with boundary issues.Yes, we’re all animals here and yes, dating is initially about physical attraction, but there has to be something more to make a relationship (or even a not-totally-painful date) work out.Online dating: It is not that hard, and yet so many people make it so hard.I’ve been documenting OKCupid atrocities for a while now, and a lot of themes crop up in the terrible messages that daters send me for, um, critiquing.The beauty of internet dating is that we all get to specify what we want.Respect that and don’t waste anyone’s time – including your own.No one wants to date sad-sack, and no one wants to hear about your terrible past dating life the first time they talk to you.We’re all internet dating here – it follows that we are all single and perhaps don’t want to be.
A one-sentence message probably isn’t saying enough, but you also don’t want to send a novel.
We all want to get laid and we all have our sexual proclivities, and if we like something in particular we may mention it on our dating profile.
But even if there’s a recognition that we, like almost every other adult human being, sometimes enjoy having our genitals touched, there’s no need to go all porno upon first introduction. Until you’ve gone actual porno in real life, leave the porno-chat alone.
Sure, it’s a pain to actually read through profiles and send unique messages to each person, but aren’t you here to find a date?
Learn a little something about the person you’re messaging, and reference that in your communiqué.
Do you live in Tennessee and are up for some long-distance chatting but she’s in New York and wants someone local?